How to Strive for Success Mindfully

For me, success was working in the big city, climbing the corporate ladder, earning a large paycheck and killing it in the office. I got there, but I suffered along the way – eventually leading to adrenal fatigue and major burn out. My idea of success has changed. I am still a career-driven woman, but my mental health has become my priority.

We all want success in some way or another. Whether it means wealth, career happiness, fame, power or love – success in life is a concept that’s meaning is entirely dependant on the person seeking it. But for all of us, success is the achievement of a goal, reaching a place our lives that we have visualised and strived for.

It’s good to hold ourselves to a high standard right? To set life goals, work hard and achieve them? Well – yes and no. In a society that tells us, we are failures is we aren’t startup CEO’s, successful artists or entrepreneurs by the time we hit our 30s – and with powerful forces hitting us from all angles defining what success means for us, the pursuit of success can be an anxiety-filled one. 

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”

Albert Schweitzer

So how can we make sure we are looking after our mental health on our road to success?

Make sure your dreams are your own

Philosopher Alain de Botton explains in his comforting Ted Talk titled A Kinder, Gentler Philosophy of Success, how social hierarchy and job-snobbery have made it so the biggest fear of failure isn’t loss of income or status, it’s the judgement of others and how the biggest tool for our journey to success is to make sure we are aiming for our true meaning of success, not someone else’s or societies. 

Be realistic

Just like goal setting, success needs to be attainable. Dreaming big is great, don’t get me wrong – we just need to be so careful that we aren’t setting ourselves up to fall before we even start. Saying that we need to make sure the goals we set aren’t too easy. This could lead to a pretty hefty anti-climatic situation. By setting realistic yet challenging goals, you hit the balance you need. These are the types of goals that require you to “raise the bar” and they bring the greatest personal satisfaction.

Change our language

Another takeaway from Alain de Botton’s talk is how, in former times, someone in tough circumstances might be called “unfortunate” or “down on their luck,”. Nowadays they are more likely to be called “a loser,” a social condition that exacerbates feelings of personal failure and increases the risk of anxiety and depression. Reminding ourselves that some of the variables that work against us in our quest for success are totally out of our control – and separating it from the times where we could have ‘done better’, can change the way we view failure immensely

Celebrate the small wins

Whenever you hit a small benchmark on the way to success, stop for a while to enjoy that fact. Give yourself a pat on the back! Go out for a wine or a nice lunch. This way you will be that much more motivated to get to the next achievement.

Remember – there is really no ‘there’

My view is that for most of us, there will be no ‘eureka’ moment where you can say ‘that’s it – I made it. I am now successful’. The most successful people in the world still have dreams and future goals, and so will we. Waiting and waiting until we reach some mystical ideal could mean we are never really satisfied or fulfilled. 

“Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.”

Joyce Brothers

Live for today too

Mahatma Gandhi said, “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” We need to look at what we have achieved in our lives so far and enjoy it – after all, what is to say that the success we achieve in the future won’t get forgotten so easily. It’s easy to get swept up in the new thing we are doing, but appreciating today, practising gratitude and loving our life is so much more important.

Remind ourselves of some facts 

At the age of 40, Samuel L. Jackson hadn’t yet starred in a movie, Julia Child was working in advertising and Vera Wang had barely gotten her start in fashion – actually, Vera Wang hadn’t designed a bridal gown until she herself got married – at 40.

Colonel Sanders only became a successful restaurateur after he failed as a lawyer, insurance salesman, and tire salesman. His age when he came up with his “secret recipe”? 50.

Ray Kroc sold paper cups, was a piano player, and worked as a milkshake multi-mixer salesman before he founded a little company called McDonald’s at age 52. And John Pemberton invented Coca-Cola when he was 55. 

I’ll just leave you with that.